Dear Unsatisfied Customer

[In response to previous post below]

Snee Zee Allergy, Inc.

4637 Pollen Lane

Grassville, Oklahoma

May 21, 2010

K. Bandit

Unknown Address

Dear Unsatisfied Customer:

We are committed to making you, the consumer, feel as though you are our number one priority.  It is our job to invade your system and create runny noses, itchy eyes and nasal congestion.  Without our services, you might actually enjoy the Spring and Summer seasons and this is against everything we believe in; we simply cannot allow it.  

We are unclear as to how you slipped past our radar for 26 years, but we can assure you, we have our best and brightest looking into it.  Do not fret - we will make up for lost time.  And to show that we mean business, we'll throw in some sinus pressure for good measure!

We hope to keep your business as long as possible.  As our dedicated staff works day and night to make sure you're as uncomfortable as you can possibly be, please help yourself to free samples of conjunctivitis [limit 2 per customer].

 Sincerly,

Team Allergene

Bringing you allergies since the dawn of time.